"Stick with me my friends, there are brighter days ahead. This much I know to be true"

     It seems very fitting that these were my last blog words almost a year ago to the day. Looking back on that blog post, I remember wanting to believe so desperately the words I typed. I wanted to believe that there were, in fact, bright days ahead, but I wasn't so sure. But today is a good day, in fact every day since September 11 have been really good days. September 11 was the best of days. Unfortunately, it fell on one of the worst days for our country, but that day in the Groves' house God graced us with the news our greatest blessing. September 11, 2013 was the day we saw two lines.
     I didn't always know I wanted to be a nurse, but what I did know was that I always wanted to be a mom. I wanted a house full of children. I wanted a life surrounded in the chaos of tiny finger prints and smudged windows. But what I didn't know was that it was a lot harder than my sex ed teacher made it sound. I didn't know it would involve taking my temperature every morning before even moving a muscle, or collecting a urine sample at the same time every day to test for ovulation. I also didn't know it would involve blood tests, ultrasounds, and multiple doctor's appointments, but it did. It was 6 days before our first appointment with one of the city's best fertility doctors and 3 weeks after I had been told "something's not right". We had closed one chapter of our journey to parenting and we were ready to start the next. With all the emotions stirring inside of me, I realized something was missing and it was the something I had been hoping I'd miss since the moment I said "I do". I was pregnant.  

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

Whew. You know you've been absent from the blogging world when you forget how to log in. I'd like to say that the absence is because of wonderful and thrilling things going on, but anyone who knows me knows that is not the case. Truth is, when I started this blog I promised myself I would only write about the positive.  Staying true to the "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't blog at all", I took a step aside. Don't get me wrong, my life is a beautiful life and one I will never ever take for granted. But sometimes things don't always go as planned. These past few months have been just that. In the midst of turmoil at my job, a super packed-summer, the knock-down-drag-out pure state of exhaustion I've been living in and the realization that God's plans will always trump ours, its been hard. But thanks to some really wonderful people in our lives, we'll make it through. Stick with me my friends, there are brighter days ahead. This much I know to be true. 

Good Taste in People

 While I was talking to a co-worker the other day, we learned we knew several of the same people. Then she said one of the kindest things to me-"You have really good taste in people"   It's true, I do. If there is one special talent I have, I am an exceptional judge of character. This is not be confused with judgmental. I am many things, but judgmental I am not. I attribute this special talent to my professional experience. Prior to being a nurse, I was a bartender and you learn a lot about people in a short time after they've had a few drinks. Then I became a nurse, and an ER nurse at that. Everyday, I deal with sociopaths, drug addicts, multiple personality disorders, and manipulative behaviors to name a few. Mixed in with these, you have the WWII vets whose pride outweighs their sense of reason and will insist nothing is wrong when you can tell they are sicker than any other patient in the department. You learn to pick up on a few behaviors. You learn to tell who's telling the truth and who's lying through their teeth. And after you get attacked by a patient. or have your life threatened on multiple occasions, your fight or flight response heightens. You learn whose company to keep and whose company to put away.
     I made a very hard decision a long time ago to rid toxic people from my life. I read a quote once which said you are most like the five closest people to you- choose wisely. And it's true. I didn't want to be described as the nice girl who hangs with the mean girls or (heaven forbid) the opposite. So I walked away from some toxic relationships. It was hard. Some of them felt like a divorce, but in the long run, I'm a much happier person. I'm a firm believer in the "Golden Rule". I believe that if I expect anything from anyone, I better be able and willing to do 10 times more for them. I believe that if you invest in your relationships, they will nurture and develop you in the long run. And I believe if you surround yourself with wonderful people, you, too, will become a wonderful person. It's true, I have good taste in people. And chances are, if you're reading this, you're a good person too. Here are just a few of my "good people". Love. 

                         

There's No Place Like Home

    It's true when they say there's no place like home. I love the home I share with my husband. I love having a kitchen full of equipment and a bed I once only dreamed of, but there will always be a part of me that calls my parents' house "home". I lived there for 22 years and returned home for a short (or not so short) period of time before JG and I were engaged just a few years ago. It's one of the few places I feel like myself. A place I can go to regroup, cry if I need to, and say things only parents understand. If you have ever met my parents you know that any amount of kindness I put forth is a direct result their teaching.
   I know they say the older you get, the more you appreciate your family, but it takes on a whole new level at a certain stage of your life. Over the years, I've watched my parents transition from our bosses,to our supervisors, and now to our friends. They were, and still are, wonderful parents to all of us. (And I'm fairly certain my husband would say they are remarkable in-laws) They were strict, set their expectations high and their tolerances low, but they taught us to be the people we are. They taught us to be individuals who are kind to strangers, generous to causes they believe in, family oriented, and most importantly, guided in faith.
   I got to thinking about how fortunate I am the other night on the way home from their house. JG was gone to the Pacer's game and I opted for a quick visit. A "quick visit" turned into 4+ hours, dinner, and a bottle of wine and I could have stayed longer. We talked about healthcare, the demise of our country, the Jodi something or another murder trial, home decor, and pizza pies and it was wonderful. It's strange how the people you once took for granted, become the people you look for to center and re-focus you in times a need. These are my parents. They are lovely, kind, beautiful, and brilliant.

Think of Something You Love

When I started thinking about starting a blog, I struggled with coming up with a name. Weeks went on, and my poor friends, heard every single one of them. Colleen's Chronicle, Leeney's Ledger, The Groves Gazette, Our Groves Are Growing, Colleen Lately and on and on. "Think of something you love" suggested my sister. Which got me to thinking, what do I love?

I love this guy

And these two

And Doing This

And Doing This

And These Sweet Little Faces 

And Sometimes I love doing this

And of course, I love my enormous family, date nights, that feeling you get when you cross the finish line of your first half marathon and a good night's sleep. But aren't these things everyone loves?

    I guess you could say my loves aren't unusual. But I do love wine. I mean really love wine. (I'm partial to wine's dear cousin beer, too) I know, a lot of girls say this and maybe it's just in our genes to fall in love with a drink that makes you feel classy when you drink it even if it's Boone's Farm from a Styrofoam cup. Maybe  it's because what of  wine means? Rarely do people chose to get sloppy from wine. Yes, it happens, but those people usually learn their lesson the next morning. Wine isn't about the alcohol, it's about the memories. It's about family gatherings and holidays. It's about fall days at the winery with friends. It's about Wednesday night wine club where some of the city's brightest and kindest women meet to catch up and support each other. It's about the dreams and friendship that all come from such a small bottle. That, my friends, is why you win some and you wine some. Happy Sunday! 

It Started With a List

     Several years ago after a slew of disappointing dates, my sister and I (and a couple bottles of wine) came up with a list of things we would like to see in our perfect match. At this point, I had spent most of career in the service industry, hence why there are several mentions of food or drink, but I have a theory you can tell a lot about a man by what he eats and drinks. Anyhow, back to this list. Without sounding shallow  (I promise you I'm not), here is what I can remember: 

My perfect match:

• Knows how to drive a stick shift
• Doesn't take longer to get ready than me
• Doesn't drink out of a straw (to-go cups are the exception)
• Drinks a "Manly" Drink ( If his favorite drink is a chocolate martini, by all means, but if I'm drinking scotch on the rocks, he better be able to choke down something a little stronger)
• Knows how to order a steak
• Tips well
• Loves his family
• Is nice to strangers
• Keeps his word  (if he says "I'll call you tomorrow" that doesn't mean 4 days later)

     I give you this list only to introduce you to my life. For years, I was known as the girl with the worst dating luck. From being set up with a registered sexual offender to catching a glimpse of an ankle bracelet during a date (two separate individuals, mind you) I had terrible luck with dates. When I was 24, my roommate asked to introduce me to one of her high school friends. Always hesitant, I expected something along the lines of "Oh, no. Really, that's okay" to come out of my mouth, but for whatever reason "Really?! Yeah, that'd be great!" was what I heard myself say. I can't explain why, but I'm a firm believer that all things happen for reason so I went for it.

       From the moment I met JG, it was clear he was loved. He lit the room up with personality and optimism. He was everyone's friend and the life of the party. After our first date I realized he was also just my kind of guy. He drove a stick, was well dressed but timely, pulled the straw out of a glass during dinner, drank whiskey, talked highly of his family,  tipped well and called me the next day...and the next day...and the next day.   We ended things after a few months due only to conflicting schedules, but always stayed in touch.(I was in nursing school full time and bartending nights so my schedule wasn't exactly conducive to a whirlwind romance)

       Fast forward a few years later, I was at an IRL race with the less-than-stellar guy I was dating at the time and but I was texting JG  and wishing he was there. I came home from that trip, ended things with this less-than-stellar man and met JG for a drink later that week. Turns out, he had also just ended things with a less-than-stellar girl.  And still true to his word, he called me the next day...and the next day...and everyday since for the last four years. 

    As I type this, I'm sitting across from JG in our home. I share his last name now and most importantly of all, we share a future.  I am an expert of nothing.  Just a girl in my thirties, learning to juggle the demands of an exhausting job, the life of a newlywed, and the extended family of a devote Irish Catholic. I am quick-witted and sharp-tongued, but my heart is big and my intentions are good. This is our story and a chronicle of our life if you will.